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Six. Months.
I really can't believe we've had Z in our family for half a year now.
It passed in a blink of an eye and I wish so badly that time can slow down just a little bit. I find myself doing a double take when I see him every morning. He is still so small and very much a baby also so much bigger than I expected at this stage.
I still remember how fearful I was of breaking him when he was just born - fragile, delicate, and easily cradled in one arm.
I remember the long late nights in the nursery, rocking him in my arms anticipating his next nursing session and wishing the newborn stage would move a little faster (mostly because of sleep deprivation). He fit in my lap so snuggly with what seemed like much room to grow.
I remember how quickly the days passed where I would spend most waking hours just letting him contact nap on my chest. I loved how much comfort it brought him and how an unspoken bond was strengthened by pure touch.
I remember thinking... six months is so far out!
And now it's not. Tears are swelling even as I write this.
This is going to sound so cliche but I really never knew I could love someone so much.
If I were to summarize one of the most meaningful lessons I've learned this far into my motherhood journey, it is that I finally understand what it means to just delight over someone. To find so much joy and fulfillment just being in the presence of another. Strip away where we are or what we are doing (because let's face it, most days are spent on the play mat in our living room :)), the simplicity of being with him fills my cup.
His joy causes it to overflow.
Each morning, no matter how little sleep we had the night before, I can't help but smile at the sight of his little happy face. Even the crying sessions have been such sweet moments of being able to bring him comfort and security.
Don't get me wrong - there has been our fair share of growing pains, particularly with James' and my marriage - but fruit of our labor has been so incredibly rewarding.
In this past month, we've... Had all the Christmas festivities! to start our new family traditions. Not sure Z enjoyed them as much as I did but my hope is to build childhood memories for him over the years. Festivities included:
Cutting our first Christmas tree! Comically enough, James and I wanted to start this tradition when we got married but after two failed attempts (with backstories for another time), we finally did it with the little one in tow now :) I suppose that makes it even more meaningful
Fantasy of Lights walk through - something that's been on my bucket list! It was COLD but got us in the Christmas spirit!
Christmas pictures with Santa (twice) - Z did great! Pretty much had no expression and almost pulled off Santa's beard
Christmas in the park - we went in the morning on Christmas Eve and it was SO much nicer with no crowds and time to stroll through the displays
Christmas lights drive through in Willow Glen - since it was raining on Christmas day, we decided to get out of the house to do something festive
Friendsgiving gathering & White Elephant gathering
Family Christmas jammies - had to :)
Christmas aside, there's also been a few changes including...
Started Z on solids. I've been soaking in this phase of watching him explore foods - his expressions are priceless and to my surprise, his preferences were not what I expected (eg. not a big fan of fruits but will down some beans and spinach haha). He LOVES his spoon utensils and much prefers that over using his hands. Ironic because he stuffs his fingers in his mouth whenever he can!
I followed the solid starts guide and his very first solid was oatmeal. Z wasn't really into it (perhaps because the concept of solids was a shock) but by the second meal, he was asking for more! So far, we've done: oatmeal, avocado, banana, quinoa, chicken, ground beef, pumpkin, carrots, broccoli, spinach, sweet potato, zucchini, cauliflower, mango, beans
Z discovered his new favorite toy... a jumper! We got Z a jolly jumper last month and he seemed indifferent to it. He would mostly dangle from the frame and enjoy the views but not much jumping was involved. I decided to get him an ice cream truck jumper instead for Christmas and he now jumps up a storm! He can go on and on until we pick him up :) I love seeing his face light up as his little feet move non-stop! A great way to burn off those extra calories from the solid food.
Z has also been talking up a storm with his newfound discovery of sounds he can make. Most notably, he has discovered blowing bubbles and raspberries (better than his mama can!). He seems to talk the most right before he needs to go to bed (I think he knows!!) and we've captured many clips of his nonstop chatter.
We've started implementing a more regular bedtime routine and it is one of my favorite times as a family. About 30 minutes before bed, he will start with one last nursing session. We'll then read a few books (puppet books have been a big hit but the beginners Bible not so much haha), say our goodnight prayers, and sing his song ("You are my sunshine") as we rock him to sleep.
Independent sleep has been getting much better at night. When we put him down, he is able to put himself to sleep if he is drowsy (or even slightly awake). He is still waking up 2x a night so we are working on getting in longer stretches throughout the night but that is pretty typical at this age. Our next step is working on independent nap time sleep which has been a bigger struggle for us.
Our little man is not interested in tummy time and has now learned to quickly roll back to his backside whenever we try to encourage tummy time. It's pretty comical to see how he fights tummy time (grabbing onto the mat as we help him turn or immediately roll back if he can). He also uses his head and gravity to help him roll instead of pushing like most babies :) Even though he doesn't love rolling or being on his stomach, he thoroughly enjoys sitting up and being swung around (up-downs are his absolute favorite!)
Physically, he has grown so so much 🥺 He is still 99% in height. James took a picture of Zion holding onto me on our rocking chair and he looks like a toddler with his long body length. He can barrrrreeeely squeeze on my torso now and I have to angle him diagonally to fit on the rocking chair. Those are the moments where I am caught off guard on how quickly he really has grown 🥺 Hold your babies tight. His weight has held stead around 60-65% and his head has also been growing around 80%.
We closed off 2021 by taking Z to our favorite spots in Monterey & Carmel :) It was a quick local getaway that we've done many times (a few times when he was in the womb!) but bringing Zion was extra sweet. Some of our favorite restaurants and hiking spots are there and every time we go, I'm also reminded of why we chose to pay the exorbitant cost to live where we do. We also visited the aquarium and felt very "parental" with all the strollers and children running around.
Since Zion has been born, I've been obsessively photo documenting his life. There's probably an average of 20 photos/videos a day, every single day of his life so far. I'm not sure how long this will continue for, especially when I go back to work later this month but every so often, I find myself scrolling through old photos and trying to deeply imprint each moment as much as possible.
Memories of the early days are hazy sometimes, especially because of the newborn stage sleep deprivation but I've never wanted to live in the moment as much as I have now.
Zion Jameson, you are such a precious gift. His providence is so evident through you and in you. You are such joy. You are such simplicity.
In your short 6 months earth-side, you have taught your papa and I so much - shifting our paradigm right-side up and shedding light on a true purpose-filled life. You continue to be our motivation and our why.
We cherish you so incredibly much and eagerly await the next 6 months to unfold as you discover the world around you.
Love you forever and a day. Love you forever and always.